Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
