I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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