Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
