Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
