Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
