Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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