if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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