i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
