I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
