is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
