I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
she pinky promised me she was 18
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
