Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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