I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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