Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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