i think my tv is drunk
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize