Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
