from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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