I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
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