Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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