Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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