I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
