Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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