Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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