He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
