she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
