is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
