Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
