Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize
