yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Vodka?
Forever.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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