somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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