we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Say something about gay babies.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
