Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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