Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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