I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
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