she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize