its not stalking. its research.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
