don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
