it's too hot outside to masturbate.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
