I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
