So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize