i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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