I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
