I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize
