She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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