I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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