Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
