i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
