what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
