By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
