office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
