he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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