My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
